Religion and Marshmallows

One night, right before the weather got cold we did our joys and concerns chalice-lighting on the patio.








Then we decided it would be a good idea to roast miniature marshmallows on forks over the chalice flames.

Dia de los Muertos

Today was the Dia de los Muertos ceremony at church. And yes, we *did* sing De Colores (OMG.)

Sammy, Jordan and friends before church.




Sammy and Jordan's RE class spent the last two weeks making altars and those were assembled at the front of the church this morning. They all included representations of people and or pets that have died, either in writing or artistically.

Here are the altars. Jordan's is the one with the white hearts and Sam's is the one on the right standing on end.



Here's a better look at Sam's.



And Jordan's.



The sermon was about connecting with those that came before us and building on what they gave us. Sammy and Jordan sang a song with the Children's choir that was mostly in Spanish.





At a certain point in the service we were all invited to come to the altar and light a candle to honor people we've lost and bring photos of deceased family members. It was really touching and after the service we made a point of going over with the girls where their people are from, on both their mom's and dad's sides of their families.

Halloween Party

Jamie and I were on the committee that threw the Halloween party at church this year. It was tonight, we worked our asses off, there were a ton of games and crafts for the kids and I think everyone had a great time. Claudia and Jordan were awesome! Jordan helped with the treat bags and helped the little kids do the cake walk and read the clues in the treasure hunt. Claudia made a big painting that we used for the fishing game and also the backdrop for portraits of the kids in their costumes. She also helped with the treat bags and she did the facepainting. You won't see her in any of these photos, though, because she decided she didn't want me to take her picture tonight. And Sam's at her mom's this weekend.

This is the table decoration I made for the party. I was spraypainting the branches outside the church today and got an inkling of how graffiti artists feel trying to paint quickly before the cops come. I just knew a green-minded church member was going to happen on me using paint in an aerosol can.



Everyone was told to bring "spooky food". Jamie and I took hummus, garnished with fingers and bagel chips.



I went as that one urban legend about the woman who died because she had spiders living in her beehive.



Here's Claudia's list of things she will paint on your face (she didn't like the existing list).



Here's Jordan as a vampire. She won a prize (scariest!) in the costume contest.



This is the backdrop Claudia made. Isn't it awesome? She drew it in two seconds last night and then spent the entire day painting it and Jamie helped her towards the end of the day.



These are the gift bags we made.

Bunch O' Photos

Top shelf Halloween.

Drawing designs on pumpkins.


Sunset off our back patio.



Claudia preparing to play in the concert.


Sammy and Jordan on the way in to Claudia's band concert.

The Halloween Tree

Another Wednesday and lots to tell!

Our friends, Rafe and Christine have glorious news! Christine just gave birth to a 7lb., 15oz. baby boy, their 4th child, who we *think* is going to be named Aidan Kyle. Kyle's a darn good Texas name, but it's also the name of the football field at Christine's alma mater, Texas A&M, so you would realize how very fitting it as well, if you knew how crazy Christine is about her Aggies. Christine, in case you don't remember, is Claudia's best friend's mother and is one of my dearest friends, and she just turned 40 this year and is doing the 40 Things with me. Giving birth at 40--new thing! Hmmm. I may be forced to go her one better and give birth at 41.

Claudia's ropes course weekend was a success! They stayed in cabins at a youth retreat in Columbus, Indiana. I drove her down and dropped her off and it was gorgeous--beautiful fall trees and lots of hills. They did all the trust exercise/low ropes/high ropes stuff and they also were presented with letters from their parents around the campfire Saturday night. The letters were supposed to be "love letters" to the children that also talk about growing up and we were supposed to include a baby picture in the envelope. The Religious Education director said that she had spoken to people who had done the ropes course weekend when they were younger and they said reading the letters was one of the most profound events of their lives. Gosh, no pressure there, huh? But I'm a big fan of telling people how you feel about them and also of telling kids stuff in addition to showing them, as a sort of exclamation point to your actions, so I was really happy to have this opportunity.

Anyway, the letters were private but the baby picture was to be shared with everyone there. Claudia had three letters to read and she complained that I sent a collage of photos of her and everyone else just sent one photo. Ah, ha! I win!




All three girls are on fall break right now. It's *finally* getting colder outside. The holidays are bearing down on us like a freight train. I'm already completely stressed with all the balls we have to juggle, but we're starting earlier this year and paring down so it should be all good.

Jason and Leah are back from Germany. You should go to their blog and take a look at their photos and read about their trip (Leah's linked her travel blog there). Leah also took some amazing photos of the girls with her new camera during the Dr. Jason celebration dinner and put them on a Dr. Jason celebration dinner blog. If anyone wants a link, just email me.

Since Last Wednesday

My root-canalled tooth hurt like a mother until Sunday night, so badly that I was taking advil every four hours and it sometimes wasn't touching it and it was really difficult to eat. That's never happened with a root canal and it's still hurting intermitently today, so I don't know what that's about. Normal for a root canal?

Beverly and Walter came over for breakfast Saturday morning. Jamie made his kickass buttermilk pancakes and we made dirty rice and sauteed plums to go with them. Beverly brought us some cool stuff from Guatemala, the coolest being stories of her travels and Walter brought the girls golf clubs and putting greens. Thank you, Walter and Beverly! We'll probably have the girls write thankyou notes and then leave them in the desk drawer for six months, as usual.

Sam was with her mom this weekend in Ft. Wayne and judging from the email I got from her and her cousin (they're so cute!), they had a fabulous time.

Jordan spent the night with her friend, Sarah, and got to go to a Pacer's game and go "backstage" and she reports she and Sarah were on the jumbotron at one point.

Sunday my band played some tunes and the national anthem at the Aids Walk and we sounded very awesome!

Now we're getting Claudia ready to go on a campout/ropes course weekend with her religious education class next weekend, and Jordan's going to be practicing with the choir to sing at the Dia de los Muertos service that's coming up. Jamie's practicing for his concert in November and I'm practicing for mine in December and Claudia has one this coming week! Claudia's also considering learning the bass guitar and joining the jazz band at her school next year. Sam's wanting to play cello in 6th grade and Jordan's wanting to play saxaphone and Jamie's thinking he's going to have his very own jazz combo going.

And gearing up for Halloween! Tomorrow night the girls are going to make a Halloween tree (an idea from Mothra) and Jamie and I have teacher conferences for Sam and Jordan while they do that.

Last Wednesday

I typed this last Wednesday and forgot to post it!

Claudia had to be at school this morning at 7 a.m. to work on her Gir gumball project. I can't wait to see it.

I spent the morning at the endodontist's office having a root canal. It went really well, Jamie was super-awesome and took the morning off to go with me (I need major work and was expecting some very bad, very upsetting news but I got good news, instead--yay!).

I had to work this afternoon and I got a million phone calls from home, one even involving a light saber incident.

It's finally feeling like fall and we're pulling out the winter wardrobe and doing some shopping. We spent a lot of time tonight at Target buying school clothes for Sammy (we're buying them in shifts), including a new Halloween shirt. Hey, speaking of Halloween, here in Hell Hole Town, one of the radio stations is already playing non-stop Christmas music. I ask you, WTF?

Dr. Jason

Jason defended his disertation at IU in Bloomington Friday so now the girls are calling him Dr. Uncle Jason!

We drove up after work to celebrate with him, Leah, Beverly and Walter and Leah's dad and step-mom, Scott and Sue and had a super fun time. Scott and Sue are my kind of people so I'm going to just consider them extended family, like the extended family that they are.

The next morning on the way to the grocery store I was musing on societal standards of success and how by most anyone's standards, Jason and Leah are more than successful--marathon runners, PhD's (one in hand and one in the works) and Jason just landed a great job (probably because of *my* interview wardrobe advice, but probably he put something into it, too). And I was thinking about how they go even beyond all that by being really good people and how proud their parents must be of them.

Here are some photos of dinner Friday night.

Slice of UU

We went to church yesterday. I love it so much because it's such a crazy quilt of good/bad/weird.

First things, first, an incident during the candle ritual, served as a surprising reminder of what social animals we humans are. The candle ritual is a thing we do weekly at a certain time during the service where everyone is given the opportunity to go to the front of the church to light a candle, either silently, or to share a joy, concern, or both. The children do this in their classes, too, which I think is very nice, and we do it here at home. Today one of the visitors lit a candle. She was black and her manner was a little off and she was obviously poor, but not in the "acceptable" "I choose to be poor so I can be a writer" or "I'm an academic" kind of way, and suddenly we were all, and I'm talking about the guiltiest of the white liberal guilters, here, out of our comfort zones and you could just feel the level of unease spike sharply because........is she going to say something embarrassing? What if she violates our unspoken standards of appropriateness?!

But we made it through *that*, and the sermon, or what the non-prods call the homily, was on social justice. Then after church, during (free-range, fair trade, only, or we'll come to blows) coffee hour, there was a demonstration on how to recycle certain plastics (like #11 and #9, or something) in the sanctuary. Across the building, out by the coffee service and completely independant of what was going on in the sanctuary, I saw two random people digging plastic cups out of the trash to recycle. There were two petitions to sign on a table set up by the coffee pots, one we wanted to sign having to do with Darfur and the Beijing Olympics and one we simply couldn't, something about pacifism. We just can't go for that. No can do.

In their religious education classes, the little girls are learning the Hebrew Bible (that's what Unitarians call the Bible and I think it's hilarious), New Testament this time, which even though we're not Christians, I think is incredibly valuable. Claudia's class all went home with henna tatoos of the symbol for infinity, but her lesson? We're really not sure. Jamie and I are on the Religious Education committee and we go to meetings for it periodically. It's cool and funny and painful all at the same time. For instance, we wanted to buy a children's picnic table for outside under one of the trees. We can't get plastic because the Green Committee will get pissed. We have to consult with the fine arts committee because it has to be asthetically appropriate for the campus. At the last meeting there was discussion on snacks for RE classes and one of the women had created a list of appropriate snacks for the teachers to bring the children each week. Which, ok, but I threw out there that, you know what? If I'm teaching a class, likely as not, I'm going to be dashing into the grocery store on Sunday morning, late for church and grabbing a box of Crispy Cremes for the kids. And I didn't say, but I FELT it, that if I'm volunteering my time and spending my money on snacks, I kind of feel like everyone can damn well like whatever I choose to show up with and also that sort of thing isn't going to kill anyone's kid if a nutritional disaster like that falls on their wee heads once a week. But I didn't and won't choose that as a hill to die on. Claudia's teacher doesn't follow the dietary guidelines so much (the week before they had cheese dip, which is NOT on the list next to unsweetened dried fruit procured from Trader Joe's) and this week their lesson involved popcorn but I have no idea what the lesson was about because Claudia said everyone was paying attention to eating the popcorn, not what the popcorn could teach them.

During the service I experienced an "exploring my theology" moment which happens periodically. What prompted it today was the fact that I got very emotional, exactly like I used to get sometimes about God when sitting in church back when I was a Methodist. I thought that was interesting.

Our church sanctuary is pretty plain and modern. There are no stained glass windows, but there are big clear glass windows that frame the tops and sides of the walls so we have a view of huge, beautiful trees. After we sang the kids out of the sanctuary to their classes--go now in peace, may the spirit of love surround you, every where you may go--I got really teary sitting next to Jamie, leaning against his arm, in a room full of people that I'm getting to know more all the time, people who have common values and sensibilities and goals with me and us. The door was propped open and a nice breeze was blowing in and we were sitting about three feet away from the musicians that were playing that day. At that moment I knew the children were in not just a good place, but an exceptional place. So I sat there and listened to the violins, cellos, piano, clarinet and oboe play and became so focused, not on the joy in and/or love of a deity, but joy for my life. Intense love of my life and my husband, my children, my friends and family and actually, me. So I quietly wept. So emotional mornings in church are there for us all, whatever religious path we choose, even Unitarian Secular Humanists.

Jason and Leah's Death March

Congratulations to Jason and Leah for running and FINISHING the hottest Chicago Marathon in History!!! Twenty six miles in 88 degree heat.

I totally admire the both of them.

You can read all about it on their blog.

Water-dwelling creatures in amber

Discovery News has an interesting article today about entombed water-dwelling creatures.

Claudia doing math homework and what's for dinner

That's a henna tattoo infinity symbol on Claudia's hand.

It's chicken fried steak!



Last night we had vegetarian lasagna. We've had non-stop healthy stuff for DAYS! Sometimes, I crave food from home *so* much, so this is what we're having tonight with garlic mashed potatoes and cream gravy.

Jordan and Sammy watching TV

Zim

Claudia's next art project assignment is a paper mache object and it has to do something. Claudia's is Gir from Invader Zim

Gir looks like this:





This is Claudia working on it and watching the Daily Show.





Not finished but looking fantastic and it's also a gumball dispenser. Cool!!!

Social Butterflies

Sammy and Jordan both had a friend over to play today. Here they are eating our famous chocolate cinnamon cake and popcorn.



It's been very social around here, lately. Sammy has been invited to a barbeque tomorrow afternoon with another friend, Jordan will probably bring someone home from church to spend the afternoon and next Saturday Jordan's been invited to a Pacer's game with another friend and go "back stage" and also spend the night.

Grandmother

Grandma Esther fell a couple of weeks ago. For those of you who don't know, Grandma Esther is my paternal grandmother. She's 99 years old and lives in a retirement center in Texas. Not a nursing home because she's too independent for that. Just yet, anyway.

That Sunday afternoon my sister and I both had voice mail messages from our mother that Grandma had fallen, broken her hip and ankle and needed surgery. I was sure, quite sure, that Grandma wouldn't make it through that surgery. Who ever heard of a person so old having surgery? Those were long hours of upset and worry and tears. They tested her heart and it was strong, they performed the surgery and she made it through to fight with the doctors and physical therapists the next day. Like she always has.

I know what you're thinking. You're assuming, as I did when I heard the news, that she fell in the bathtub or on a slippery hallway floor or, you know, because she's 99 years old. But no, we were wrong. She was watching the Cowboys game and decided to take her walker and dash over to the Target store located next door to the retirement center to exchange a shirt during half time. She was sure she could make it back before the third quarter started and maybe she would have made it if she hadn't used the back door coming back into the retirement center. That door is not automatic and she got caught in the door. Jordan's been saying, in a way that tells me she's impressed, that "Grandma Esther's a rebel!". Way to be a 99-year-old bad influence, Grandma.

It's times like these that bring me up short and force me to re-evaluate because everything comes into such sharp focus. I see what's important and see where I've failed. In my life, where trauma and fires and then readjustment and getting over it have ruled everything for the last several years, so much that's really important to me had to be jettisoned from my immediate concern and attention.

I've lost touch with my grandmother. There's a line that extends from my mother to me. Invisible, but there. My mother is my matriarch, and that of my sister, since our mother's mother is dead. Grandma Esther, older than us all, is not our matriarch, for there can be only one, and that's a line, it seems to me, that extends from mother to daughter, not mother to son to daughter. She is, however, this paternal grandmother, fundamentally important to me. Her traits, physical, emotional and intellectual have descended down to me and on again to my daughters. She is a part of me, and I know her so intimately, almost as if I have her memories written in my dna, and her mother's and her mother's mother on back. Ancient and mine, too. Maybe I should set aside my post-traumatic stress and let a fire or two burn if I have to and pick up the phone and call her sometime. Or send her a letter in 18 pt. Times New Roman.

Photos

Jordan and Sammy off to wait for the bus.


Jamie and the dog made up.


Jamie and Jordan hanging out on the patio.